Mf July 2 2018 Member of His Body, His Flesh and of His Bones

[Music] [Speaker 1] Churchisms, fellowships cannot be more spiritual than the individuals and families that constitute them. God greatly desires a godly home for him. These are words of restoration and instruction in righteousness from Family Tech Ministry. May you be blessed as you listen. [Speaker 2] Hello. As we try to take a step further today in all these things that we have been saying. Jesus set the standard. Husband love as Christ loved the church. Wife submit to the man in all things as the church submits to Christ. We saw that there was a "nevertheless." Both of them, the woman have not become the church triumphant. She's still the church militant. She has not fully become a perfect thing. The man is still not glorified. He's still carrying flesh and blood that cannot inherit the kingdom of God. So you find the struggle. So you said, "nevertheless." Now what we told ourselves something that what God want to see in a marriage, that make God see that the marriage is successful, is to see a man who is committed to loving as Christ and where he fails, he's not arrogant about it. He's saying, "Jesus, please help me. I want to be like you. I want to love as you love." And there's also this woman who is not looking at the infirmities of the husband who is saying, "Jesus, help me. I want to be like a church that submits unconditionally." And so both of them are looking towards Jesus and they are moving on. Now we said when God sees that in a home, that is when God says this marriage is successful. I hope you remember that very, very well. That because when the Bible says the Lord searches the heart, he tries the rein, he gives unto every man according to what is in his heart. So what the Lord want to try to say a marriage is successful is that. That's what he wants to see. And that's why you find that when that is there, there will be true humility. People will be able to admit to their fault. People will be able to say, "I'm sorry, I didn't do it well." People will be able to realize where they mistake. You get the point I'm making? Now if you look at all that we have been saying, you find that everything is dancing around one thing. Everything going round one thing. Christ is the model. Now as we try to journey a little further today, you will therefore realize that if you want to know whether your marriage will be successful or whether you as a person will succeed in marriage, the first thing to look at is to check your level of followership with Jesus. Your own personal level of followership with Jesus. Because you will realize that the basic thing about the success of marriage is that there's this brother who have learned that I cannot say no to Jesus. Do you see it? There's this sister who have learned that, "No, whatever Jesus say, that's where I'm going." It doesn't matter how I feel. It is what Jesus says. Now that is the personality test for successful marriage. It begins with testing your level of personal followership with Jesus. Now you'll be wondering why I am raising this. It's because I want to... the Bible says this is a great mystery. Now look at let's look at that scripture again. Ephesians 5:30 into 31. Let's look at it. Verse 30 says, "For we are members of his body, of his flesh and of his bone." Having said that, it now came to what? For this cause. Do you get that? I hope you know that marriage is not only meant for Christians. It's not only Christians that marry. Muslims marry, unbelievers marry. So enlarge your scope that when we are talking about marriage, God did not ordain marriage for Christians. God ordained marriage for man. I hope you get the point. Now it is among the Christians that we can now get the mind of God in creating that marriage. I hope my point is very clear. You will not find it among the ordinary man, the man who have not found Jesus, who does not have the mind of Christ. He cannot have the mind of God. Now what am I trying to show you is that you will notice that before the Lord raised verse 31, there is a matter in verse 30. You notice that "for" is a statement of premise. That 31 is premised, that is, is depending on 30. What is in 30? In verse 30 it says, "For we are members of his body, of his flesh and of his bones." Now having established that, it now say, "For this cause." Now a man shall leave father and mother. What he's saying is that when we are not correct member of the body, when a man marry, the first problem you will see is that the man will not leave father and mother. Are you following me? If we are correct member of his body, what you will find is that you will find a man who truly leave father and mother. Maybe you don't understand what that means. What he's saying is that normally the most important person in a man's life is the parents. You get the point I'm making? He's talking about proximity. There's the issue of authority. It is the father that gives out. But more importantly is the fact that the most proximal person to us is either the mother or the father. Now he's saying that the man will leave these people. When we are members of his body, you will find that there will be a man who can truly leave father and mother. There is no way your father or your mother can come to a point where he says you are no more my child. There is no law under heaven that can make it possible. Even if he has a certificate in his hand that says this boy is not your son or your daughter. What still be the reality? He's your son, he's your daughter. There is nothing you can say, "Okay, I don't want to see you again. I reject you." That is at the level of speaking. At the level of reality, it remains. Now a man leaves such kind of union that is undissolvable. Are you following me? If we are truly members of his body, a man will leave such a union that is not dissolvable. He'll be able to leave it. He'll be able to move out of it. He'll be able to come out of that thing completely. And in doing that, he's going to join himself to a lady and the two of them, they will be one. Do you get that? What it means is this. The oneness in marriage is not possible except people are actually members of the body, of his flesh and of his bone. Oneness... maybe I should use an illustration that me and my wife normally use sometimes when we go for seminar. Now if you are to take kerosene, water, palm oil. Either kerosene and water or palm oil and water. You get any of those combination. If you put the kerosene and water together, what do you normally observe? They are immiscible. What will happen? What will normally happen to the water? The water will go down. It will now become what? When the water goes down, it will become something. Something will happen to the water when it goes down. It's a common thing now. It will form circular globules. That's it. You get the point I'm making? Circular globules. The water will be in a world of its own inside the kerosene. That's what happens in most marriages. They are together but they are not one. For them to be one, take another one now. When you take water and milk and you mix it together. You have a solution. That is what God wants. Do you get what I'm trying to say? What the Bible is saying is that what you see in verse 31 is not possible except people are members of the body, of his flesh and of his bone. When you are not truly in a correct union with Jesus, I can now announce to you, you can never form a correct union with somebody else. And by that somebody I'm talking about the marriage union. There is a union that God is looking for in marriage. That union, if I'm to use Yoruba language, ko se pe ki won papo. Olorun fe ki won popo. They can be like this. They are just together. They are distinct there. Now what I'm bringing to your attention is that the true challenge in marriage, the question you need to ask yourself as you look towards marriage is what is the level of union that I have with Jesus? That is the basis for the union in marriage. So all kinds of people marry, but only few people achieve the mind of God in marriage. And the people who are able to achieve it is that they are people that are correct members. They are actually one with Jesus. Their oneness with Jesus is correct. They are not just members of his bone. No. They are members, they are joined to him in body. They are joined to him in the flesh. You know we've been talking of Mr. Flesh. Have you seen it now? In that flesh, they have yoked it with Jesus. So everywhere Jesus turns the neck, that's where they turn. So the body say we are members of his body. They move further. They are also members of his flesh. That flesh, that Mr. Flesh has been joined. Mr. Flesh is no more autonomous. Mr. Flesh is no more independent. Mr. Flesh himself have been married to somebody. So he's under a master. So anytime [Speaker mimics master's voice] master says, "Are you well? Master says, what's your problem?" Sometimes something will happen in our own marriage. I tell you, you will just [Speaker mimics angry noise] and the Lord will just say, "What's your problem? What has this woman done that you are turning your head like this? What is your problem? Why are you troubling yourself?" Are you understanding me? Mr. Flesh is not a wild animal. He's not in the field. He has been tamed. It has been joined to somebody. Not only did they join the flesh, they did not stop there. They've also been members of his bone. You'll be wondering why the Bible is specific with this word. What is the strength of the body? The framework of the body is the bone. Once any of the bone, once you break any of them for instance, what happens? You lose shape. So what he's say when he said that we are members of his bone, even his bone, what is it trying to say? What is the framework of the body? If you remove the skeleton, what will happen to all the meat? They will just lose their shape. The meat only enters the shape of the bone. Am I correct? Those of you in biology. Am I very correct? Okay. We have a biologist here. Sister, are we correct? The meat just join themselves to the bone. Anywhere, anyhow the bone is, the meat just join themselves to the bone. If you have a bowleg, what will happen to the flesh too? The flesh will take that shape. You know what he's trying to say? Are you getting the weight of what we are saying? He's talking about your intrinsically... your existence. The totality of your existence. One challenge we are having today is that more and more and more brothers and sisters that enters into marriage, the totality of their existence is not in Jesus. They can exist, they can take shape outside Jesus. They can take shape outside him. They can pattern their life after a pattern. You can see where for example you take this hand... the bone is straight but the flesh is bent. Is that flesh attached to that bone? It's not attached. So in some life there are detachment. There are detachment. There is no complete attachment. That is why you notice that immediately he said that for we are members of his body, of his body one, of his flesh two, of his bone three. The union is solid. Once we can get that solid union, you'll be able to find a man, you'll be able to get a correct man. A correct man that will leave his father and his mother. And please look at something. We'll find a man that is able to leave his father and his mother and shall be joined unto his wife. Do you follow something there? Later we'll come and look at that. He didn't say the man will be joined to a wife. The man will be joined... it means he was able to get his wife before joining. He didn't get a wife. He got his wife. That's another matter for another day. It is his wife. Do you get that matter? His wife. You remember that Adam was given several animals that first came and he was naming them, naming them. None was found for him. Then God made him to sleep. And then God went and designed. And then when Adam said, "This is the bone of my bone." It was not by courtship. It was not by dating. It was by revelation. He was fast asleep when Eve was made. And there was no relationship. There was no 'mommy, daddy', this sister I know her very well, she's two by four by five, she comes from my village, her elder sister is Joke. There was nothing like that. Just saw her. "No, this is the bone of my bone. She shall be called... because she was taken out of me." That was too specific. Was it not too specific? He was fast asleep when that was done. It means that information he was given, if you go back again to Matthew, Jesus said, he who made them, made them male and female and said, "For this cause a man shall leave father and mother." It was Adam that said, but Jesus said God said. So what was the basis of Adam's speaking? You will notice that Adam was the member of God's body, God's flesh and God's bone. There was correct union such that his judgment was not in error. That is a matter for another day. But I want you to know that the Bible says that he shall be joined to his wife. His wife. Now, but the matter we are looking at very seriously... so you know that when he's joined to his wife, he say and they will become one flesh. But you know that even though it is his wife, it is in that same marriage that God is raising "nevertheless" so that you don't think that when you get your wife... we have discussed nevertheless two weeks ago. But note that it is his wife. That is the matter we are pursuing. I've just raised, but we'll discuss that much more later. But what I want you to see is that to which extent has your life gotten to with verse 30? What is the level of union that you share with Jesus? What is the intimacy you share? What is the depth? Is it just your body or your flesh and your bone? Your bone, I mean the way you pattern your life. The patterning, how is your life patterned? What are your values? What are your priorities? How is your life designed? What comes first in your life? What comes second? Pattern, the way your life is patterned, the bone, the shape, the framework of your life. The flesh, I'm talking about your self-will. This self-will. "Me, I don't take nonsense. Me and you, that one is Bible. We are going to face reality in this matter." I'm talking about that is a man whose flesh is independent. It's not as if God is through with any of us. But if Mr. Flesh has been submitted, you have yoked yourself to "take my yoke." There is even by the time you want to go like this, something will pull you back. You don't need your partner to pull you back. You don't need the person. You don't need your partner. Because your partner cannot pull you if Jesus cannot pull you. He cannot. So what makes our partner to suffer is that our life could not be pulled by the Master. And there is nothing they can do. They can't... if the Master cannot pull you. If it's used to be the man. "The woman that you married. I married you with my money." Is that not what you will be shouting? Is it that one that want to pull you? And if it is the woman, "This useless man." Is that useless man that want to pull you? The person cannot. So we need to check. You see, we need to look into our life very, very critically. Because what I find most times as we counsel with people today is that there is a problem with this matter. There is a serious problem. The average Christian is only joined to the body of the Lord. The average Christian you will find. That's how they grow into leadership. And you see in fact they will be folding trouser. "Me and you. Me and you. The violent take it by force." Me and you. You see, certain things were not settled. Certain things were not submitted. It's not as if the person who behave properly don't have anger. Look, those things, the anger, but the anger has been submitted. That's been the difference. It has been submitted. So when it goes [Speaker mimics angry noise] master says, "Are you well? Master says, what's your problem?" Then you begin to say, "Lord I'm sorry, Lord I'm sorry." You begin to... before they will even come and say, it say, "Actually I'm sorry the way I said that time, I'm sorry about it." You're already correcting, you're already adjusting. You don't need the person to adjust you. You don't need the person. You're already adjusting yourself. It's a very serious matter today as I relate with believers, as I relate with young people, men, women. I find this problem. I've found this problem. That what is joined to the Lord is the body. The flesh and his bone, there was no join. It has not been submitted. So those things they prosper with the grace and sometimes you even pamper them. "You don't try my anger oh, you know me oh." And you think that is something to boast as a sister. [Speaking Yoruba: S'onpe were l'ibinu t'emi.] Don't worry, sister. You think they fear me. When I talk like this, they fear. They dare not do it. And you think you have won. Even the almighty, that's how you fear God? Do you fear to enter God's presence? That kind of fear that you want people to fear you, do you fear like that with God? So it's a matter we need to check. It's a thing we must beg God to continually grow in. If you are not growing in these two direction, I am telling you, your marriage will not be peaceful. You will not find peace. Go and look at peaceful marriage. Not as if there are no... go and check. I'm telling you. You talk with people who are over thirty-five years say, "She offends me and I offend her." But you'll find that there is this aspect of that God is... but you will find that they are happy in their marriage. You will find true joy in their home. What is making that possible is that the union is correct with Jesus. So Jesus is the mystery. Jesus is the mystery. That is what the world is looking for and they cannot have. Jesus is the mystery. I'm telling you. Jesus is that mystery. Jesus is that thing that brought that possibility. That made two people that naturally should... you will see their differences people that you look at, these ones they are not emotionally compatible, they are not psychologically compatible. You will see all the thing that you will feel that how were they able to come together and they are going on? What is the answer? Jesus. They will say there is only Jesus that can do this kind of thing. And I'm telling you, he specializes in doing it. Jesus can do it. He can. But you must see that progression. You must see that progression in these three verses. We are members of his body, his flesh, his bone. Then we now have a reason to live. And when we have a reason to live, there will be a reason to get his wife. Because that's where the whole... it just like that. If that one is not correct, it's not likely to be his wife. Do you get the point I'm making? And so when they join, there's likely to be problem. But there's going to be a progression. If that one is correct, it will be his wife and then they will be one. This is the order that we cannot reverse. The world have tried to reverse it. They have all kinds of things. You see, when you want to marry, first check a lot of things. Befriend her very well, befriend her, befriend her, befriend her. Test that you are mentally compatible, test that you are legs compatible, test that your hands are compatible. By the time they enter, the things still scatter. Have you not seen those things? The answer is not in the compatibility. That is not where the answer is. It's not as if the compatibility is not important. Because the man actually got his wife. I'm not underplaying it. But I'm saying that there is something more fundamental than that that we are not paying attention to. We have so commonized it, we have trivialized it. Talking about this, talking about 'what is the Lord telling you?' Say, "Forget that one, I just like her." We have move and move and move and now we have come to a point in Christianity where they say there is nothing like the will of God. It's anyone finding a wife, is just to look for and marry one. As long as she's a Christian. We keep moving on. We move and move and move and move and move. We forgot that there was never a relationship between Adam and Eve when he made the selection. That is our origin. We can keep moving away from it as we like. Let us move and move, let us bring up philosophy. But one thing you don't understand is that a river cannot flow away from its source. The more it goes away, it will just be drying, it will be dry. And what are we having today? America, four out of every five marriage will hit the rock. Is it case different in Nigeria now? Let us go back to our source. What we saw in the foundation was that there was a correct man in a correct union. And on the basis of that union, he got his wife and he made a pronouncement. We read that it was God who made the pronouncement. Let's go back to our source. Let's understand this joining. Let's understand these things. Let's drink into Jesus. Let's be deeper and deeper. Believers are the most blessed people on the universe. And yet they will leave the source of living water and they will be carrying apere, basket, of water all around. How many days will you carry basket of water before you lose the water? Why are we carrying things, carrying philosophy? Let's go back to the original. It's a very important matter. You see if that is, if we can set this right, Psalm 103 becomes a sweet thing to sing into. But I will not point to Psalm 103, I thought we'll get to Psalm 103 today but we could not get into that. But please, our concern today is, is your life a sequence of verse 30, 31 and 32? Go home and check your life. Go home. If you're already in marriage, check. Chart yourself, am I a wild animal? Am I wild? Have I joined Mr. Flesh to Jesus? What determines my value, what are my taste? You know, ask yourself. You're not married yet and you are looking into getting... these are questions don't begin to check the person you want to marry, you begin to check yourself. Much more the more if you are a man. I will explain that much more later. Much more the more if you are a man. Because many things rise and fall about the man. Let us pray for today. Let's pray for today. Let's talk to the Lord for today. Let's just close the meeting for today. I just try to save time because time have been fast spent since I came. So I'm going to talk to the Lord. Just check your own life, check your situation. Check your life, check yourself. Look inward into your own self and make a decision. It's about you. Forget the sister for now. Check your own life. Are you a tamed animal? Are you tame? I like the word that our brother in one of the drama I was watching. He talked about the earthworm Christian. He said the earthworm don't have bone. It can bend, bend, they are easily handled by the spirit of God. He was talking about the earthworm Christian that does not have a backbone. All the bone broken, no bone again. Just as the Master can easily, you get the point I'm making? They have been conformable to Jesus. You check, check, check, check your life. Is that progression taking place? If you're already in marriage, check what is troubling your marriage. Look away from your spouse. I keep telling people, it's not the problem, it's not about your spouse. You first check your own self. Check your own self and make things right. And make things right. And make things right. Thank you, Father. Thank you, Jesus. Oh, can we take this song together? I will go a little higher Jesus love can be sweeter I will go a little higher Deeper yet, oh deeper oh I will go a little higher Jesus love can be sweeter I will go a little higher Deeper yet, oh deeper yet I will go a little higher Jesus love can be sweeter I will go a little deeper Deeper yet, oh Lord deeper yet I will go a little higher Jesus love can be sweeter I will go a little deeper Deeper, just one more time I will go a little higher Jesus love can be sweeter I will go a little deeper Deeper yet. [Music] Ends.