Spiritual Nuturing of Teens

[Speaker 1] It's time for our talk. We have a short talk this morning and it's going to be centered on parenting. God bless you as you listen in Jesus' name. Amen. [Speaker 2] Praise the Lord! Somebody shout Hallelujah! Amen. By the grace of God, the Lord is speaking to us. We know today is all about family. As the Lord will speak to couples about the marriage vows and all that it entails, what the Lord expects of us, and how God wants to enrich our homes. Today, this first segment is also to talk about parenting because it's a divine call. It's a divine call, and we need to know what God would have us do and how much of his help he's ready to release unto us. May we not fail in this call in the name of Jesus. Shall we pray? Eternal Rock of Ages, Everlasting Father, Lord, we are grateful unto you again. Thank you because it gladdens your heart for your children to gather at your feet and it gladdens your heart, Oh Lord, to release blessings upon them. Lord, we know you are here. We are here and all our brethren are on the way and those online. We are here, Oh Lord. There is no distance in the things of the spirit. You are omnipresent. Let the blessings of this meeting, Oh Lord, get to everyone that is connected to it in Jesus' name. As we go into your word, Holy Spirit speak to us. Open our eyes to see Jesus. Give us new things, new insight. Breathe upon us. Open our eyes, Lord, that we may see Jesus. In Jesus' name we pray. Praise the Lord! I call this talk Spiritual Nurturing of Teens. By the grace of God, I briefly put here, what does it mean? When we are talking about parenting, nurturing of children, we have different stages. We have the young ones between zero to 10 and probably nine because looking at World Health, even adolescence, I think is starting nine now looking at the rate of development of children. But when we look at this parenting between zero and nine, it's still possible for us to just pass down instruction, command, go and get this done, and it is so. Everybody, they are still very committed. You can bully any one of them all around. But when it comes to teen and we are talking about the teenagers here, we know in psychology we call it a crisis stage for any human life. And we all pass through it. We even here by the mercy of God helped some of us at that stage while many people burnt their hands and they have the consequences living with them today. But thanks be to God for this great opportunity for us to know that in the nurturing of our teenagers, it's not only in their psychological, which is very important, it's not only about their academic well-being, it's not about their social well-being, economic well-being, but particularly for us as children of God, spiritual nurturing of our teenager is very important. Because the spiritual controls the physical. Everything we see in the physical starts from the spiritual. And that's the reason why if every other thing will work, honestly, the spiritual must be intact. The Lord will help us in Jesus' name. I put here that parenting your child through the teen years, especially in the areas of his or her spiritual growth, is a divine calling. As I mentioned that earlier, a challenge that will demand the best you've got to give and it's a wonderful privilege too, honestly, it's a wonderful privilege. If you have a child there, say to your neighbor, "You are privileged." You are privileged. If you also have people God has brought under your leadership, mentorship, it could be in your office, it could be teenagers, children's church, teenage church, say to yourself, tell that person, "You are privileged," because you are doing a great work. So the Lord will help us in Jesus' name. No matter what you are dealing with at home presently with your teen, there is hope. Tell somebody, "There is hope." Not all teenagers are rebels. But the tendency is with them more even at this stage. But there is hope. There is hope. And if you find yourself feeling inadequate in this responsibility, I also want to congratulate you. That is the right kind of person God is looking for. The person that will see his inability, the person that will depend on God and say, "God I can't do it alone." Because only those who know they can't do it on their own turn to God for help. For only those who acknowledge their weaknesses will see the strength of God at work in their lives. We can see that in 2 Corinthians 12:9. Praise the Lord! Now when we are talking about spiritual nurturing of teens, what are the goals we are to achieve? Many a times we just do it without specific goals. I thank God for Focus on the Family, in their 2001 edition, they gave us goals. Spiritual goals that parents must achieve, must work at in the life of their children before they leave home. And I want to briefly talk about that. One is a personal vibrant relationship with Jesus Christ. The Lord will help us to achieve that. You know Bible said no one can come to the Lord except whom He has drawn. And if your children must be enlisted in the kingdom of God, hey, you know it's not your making. But at the same time God is depending on you. He said He will save us and our household. We can hold God in place of prayer. We can trust Him for that and say, "God, my teen must have a personal vibrant relationship with Jesus." That is a goal every parent must achieve. It's not the goal of any Sunday school teacher. Thank God for them. If we have people that left their goal undone at home, that's the reason why we have those ones in the churches or in any ministry. But the first goal is that you make sure your teen have a personal vibrant relationship with Jesus Christ. Then the second one here is that they must have a head filled with applied wisdom from scripture. There are a lot of wisdom. Bible talks about wisdom that is of the earth in James. Talks about wisdom that is of the earth, is sensual, devilish. The wisdom that is from above is first pure. So our teenagers must have their head filled with the applied wisdom from the scripture. So that is one of the goal you are to achieve. How to get that done, we will get there. The Lord will help us in Jesus' name. The third goal is that they must also have skills. What did I call it? Skills in filtering life through a Christian worldview. We have the unbelieving worldview, the worldview on its own, the perverse worldview. But for Christians' children, Christian teenagers, if you want your teen to stand out, he or she must have a skill in filtering life, passing through this life in every segment of life, what he is doing. He must be able to filter through life with a Christian worldview. The fourth one is an ability to articulate and defend the Bible. Anywhere he goes, whatever he does, ability for your teen to articulate and to defend the Bible. That is a goal you and I must achieve. Then the fifth one is a desire to make Christ known through life, work, service, and witness. Our teen must have the desire. These are the goals we are to work at. So that we don't just nurture aimlessly. Does my child have the desire to make Christ known? Or is it that anywhere he gets to, he doesn't even want to associate with himself or want people to know that he's a Christian? There's a problem. So they must have a desire to make Christ known through their life, through their work everywhere they go when they grow up and go into the workforce, through service in anything they do and in witnessing Christ practically. Then the fifth one says faith, they must have faith that is ready to leave home. When our teenagers don't have this first five, they cannot have the faith to leave home. That is the reason when they get to campus they become something else. That is the reason why they forget the God of their parents. These goals are the things parents must work at. Many of us we pray, we do a lot of spiritual exercise, but we don't really know what are we to work at. The Lord will help us in Jesus' name. You know from all these goal, there is no where we talked about your teenager being a perfect Christian. There is no where you will get there anyway because we are all work in progress. But if all these things are in place, I can assure you they will keep becoming like Jesus daily. The Lord will help us in Jesus' name. So those are the goals of spiritual training. Now I want to talk about the tip. What are the tips? This what I have here is not all. I have not exhausted all the means or the process of successfully nurturing our children. But by the grace of God, this point the Lord laid upon my heart and by little research that I have made from the word of God, I know if we work with this, we will achieve a successful result and our teens will stand out in their generation. Praise the Lord! The first thing I have here is that I wrote here, "Relationship is the key." Tell someone beside you, "Relationship is the key." I can't hear you. Relationship is the key. You cannot mentor or influence any life that you don't have relationship with. I have some ministers of God by the grace of God that I listen to their messages. I might have only had opportunity to meet them in conference when we were on campus or even when I go places. But the relationship I have with their life through their contact, their messages, the word they speak to us, what you see from their life make me to be influenced by their message. I've listened to some that just by their message I say, "No no no, no go area." So what I'm talking about when it comes to us and our teens I mean relationship is the key. We must be for us to be an effective spiritual mentor to our teens begin with a strong parent-child relationship. Without this we can do nothing. We must be actively involved in our children's life. Let there be a regular participation and involvement with each other. With you and your children. Let it not just be that you are passing advice. Be involved in their life. One thing that fosters strong family link, fast family tie is expressing our love and commitment to one another through active and obvious participation and involvement with each other. We must keep involving. Get involved. There's something I read somewhere that for you to get into the life of your teen, if you are not part of their world, you cannot get everything about them. You won't even be able to influence or mentor them. One of the way to get to be part of their world is that you are invited. Teenagers will invite you. They will bring you in. And when I'm talking about inviting now, we are talking about, they have come to see your genuineness, they have come to see your love. "Okay, we can bring mommy in, we can see the sincerity of daddy." You are to be invited. You can't just be around them and not be part of their world. So if there's no relationship where you are obviously and constantly in connection, in participating in what they like, getting involved in what they do, play together, be part of their world. That is relationship. Many a times we parent we fail, we think it's only our role is just to pass down. Fountain. Just give instruction, you just carry out. "What about your school?" in a not a friendly environment. You only get what they want you to know. But when you have relationship with them, there is play, there is participation, there is involvement in their life, you get interested in what they do, you are not looking out for fault here and there, but even in their fault, you are there to also make them see, "Oh, this is wrong you know you can there are better ways of achieving that, there are better things to do." The Lord will help us in Jesus' name. So for us to be able to successfully nurture our teens in particular, to be their mentor, it is first by having good obvious relationship, participation, involvement in their lives. Praise the Lord! Then another one I have here to be a good example. You can't give your child what you don't have yourself. Is it possible? You can't expect him to grow above your own level of spiritual maturity and quality of life under your influence. We are talking about a goal of making our teens to have personal vibrant relationship with Jesus Christ. One of the goals we earlier mentioned. But you can't give that if you don't have that. If you yourself don't have a personal relationship with Jesus, you won't be able to transfer that to your children. They won't be able to get that quality of life through your influence. So we must first have that. So the Lord is challenging you, "Do you have a personal vibrant relationship with Jesus Christ?" You must first be an example for them to follow. Then again I also want you to know good or bad children imitate what they see their parents doing. There is nothing more detestable to a teenager than an hypocrite. They hate hypocrite. And they believe there are a lot of them all around them. But it will be disastrous if your teen will see you as an hypocrite. There is no way you'll be able to achieve the goal of spiritual nurturing in them. It is not by say "Do what I say and not do what I do." They learn more by what they see us do. Praise the Lord! They learn more by what they see us do. So let us be careful. Let us live by example, godly example, good example. All the prayers we do on the mountains, all the fasting and praying for it to have effect, all your labor, investment, monetary in different ways, for them to have effect in the life of our teens and make them stand out for Jesus, you have to be a good example to them. I've been given time. My time is up. Praise the Lord! But quickly, then I also want you to know, don't begin to think, "Hey if they are expecting as much as this from me, will I be able to do it?" It said you don't have to be a perfect Christian for you to be a role model to your teens. But you don't need to pretend. What they want is a sincere person. They respect and trust you for whom you are. Be honest about your shortcoming. Show that you are sincerely doing your best to know the Lord, to love Him, to serve Him. Then they will see a genuineness in you to follow. Praise the Lord! Then I have if at all you have mishandled the relationship with your teen, there is hope. Relationship can be rebuilt, hardened heart can be softened again. Don't close your mind. Begin again. You can start over again with prayer, confessing your mistake to God. You can also ask Him to open up the heart of your child, to open up his mind. You can ask the Lord pray that the Lord will heal the heart and give you the wisdom and grace and love for the task ahead. Praise the Lord! So there is no substitute to our active intervention or participation in our teen's age if you want them to be vessels in the hand of the Lord. Then I have here another point is that you must love unconditionally. And we can see that through the life of Jesus. Jesus' love is selfless. It's unconditional. So what will you be expecting your child to give to you, to do or not to do for you to love him? It is wrong. It's an unconditional love even when they fall, the love of God still radiate through our life. Praise the Lord! I also have just two points to go. Yes I wrote here that it is not time to coast. It is not only extreme situation that call for persistent parenting. Don't give up even if you have been doing your best and it looks as if nothing is showing forth in what I have been doing. Keep working. Keep learning how to help your teens become better. Have a dogged determination believing the best, never giving up. Then another thing about that is that you also should know your weakness and know the weakness, the world all around influencing our teenagers. So keep on praying. Somebody say, "Pray." Pray. Pray. Pray. That is another tip. You cannot exhaust the place of prayer. Keep seeking the face of God always on behalf of your children. Praying for them. Ask for God also to help you. And another thing is nurture your own life. Nurture your life before you'll be able to nurture your teen you must first nurture your life. One thing I noticed that some parents when we have been fast out, we are depleted or drain all our energy. How will you be able to help your teen? Through different kind of the rat race now. Let us nurture ourselves. Spiritually grow. Physically take care of yourself. Do regular exercise so that you have enough energy to take care of your children. Then another way to nurture yourself is look for brethren that can help you. One best way to nurture yourself is by developing a network of supporting friends. These people you have answers, they might have gone through one thing or the other, they will pray along with you. Realize that you don't have all the answers to that question, to that problem. Seek the wisdom God offers. Bible talks about James in James chapter 1:5, the wisdom that is from above. We can get that through quality relationship with brethren. We can get them in fellowship in churches that are living churches. With all these point, I trust the Lord that if we put all these into practice with the aim of achieving the spiritual goal training. The Lord will breathe upon all these and bring about the kind of teens He expects in our generation. And our children will be enlisted in God's own teenagers in the name of Jesus. Praise the Lord! Briefly let us bow down our head and speak to the Lord. Ask the Lord to help you. Lord, help my relationship with my teenagers, my children. Help me, Oh Lord, to be an effective spiritual mentor to them. Make me a good example, Lord. Help me, Oh Lord, not to be an hypocrite before my children. Help me Lord in the name of Jesus. Have I blown it up? Lord, I come back to you. Lord, please have mercy upon me. Help me to heal the heart of my children please, heal their heart. Touch their heart help me to love them unconditionally. Oh Lord, I will not relent. The devil is telling you give up, give up. No, don't give up. Have a dogged determination that your teen will turn out well. God keep me in the place of prayer. Lord keep us in the place of prayer. Help us to nurture ourselves to also come to you and gather strength, the energy we need. So that we will be able to transfer same to our teenagers. We pray that our children will stand out in the name of Jesus. And our children, Oh Lord, will be tree of righteousness, the planting of the Lord. That children, Oh Lord, will be blessed, their generation will call them blessed. They will be sight to the blind. They will be leg to the lame. They will lift up the broken hearted. They will be the ambassador of Jesus everywhere they go. In the mighty name of Jesus. Father we thank you. In Jesus' unfailing name.